Relationships

FIRST DATES – DO’S AND DON’TS FOR SUCCESS

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Times have changed over the years and so has the way people think and feel about dating. It may have become more difficult than ever now that people barely have any time for it at all. Rules have changed. Places to meet have changed. What hasn’t changed though is that people still have a genuine interest in it, and if you don’t date, you surely won’t find “the one”.

Dating can be scary, exciting, time-consuming, exhausting, amazing and much more. If you’re feeling a little lost about what to do, relax, read and learn. You’ll be ready in no time.

TIME

Show up on time or early. Showing up late tells your date that you can’t manage your time and that theirs isn’t important. Figure out how long it takes you to get ready, get through traffic and in the front door of where you’re meeting without looking frazzled, and then add an extra 15 minutes. Best case scenario is giving you a little time to sit in your car to relax for a minute, compose yourself and get rid of first date jitters.

BE YOURSELF

Don’t try to be someone you’re not. You want them to like you for who you really are! If you’re faking it, there’s no chance of that.

SMILE

When you’re thinking about what to wear, this is a must! Guys love girls who smile. A smile shows that you are friendly and are enjoying yourself, and their company.

CONFIDENCE

Be confident! A first date will never lead to a second one if you look and act like a loser. Focus on the great qualities you have and let them shine.

TALK  – but not too much

You are dating to get to know each other. Nobody likes pulling information out of the other, so let it flow.

Think of some  original questions to ask. That doesn’t mean dominate the conversation though. The other part of talking is listening. Ask something you would like to know about your date, then listen with a genuine interest. Be sure to look at each other while talking and listening. Doing anything else is just rude.

Keep the conversation positive. Resist the urge to criticize ANYONE during your conversation. It sounds negative and leaves the other wondering what you’re going to tell other people about them.

PUT YOUR PHONE AWAY!

Give your date your undivided attention. There is nothing on Facebook that can’t wait.

YOUR EX

Nothing is going to ruin your first date more than talking about your ex. This shows that you are not over them and shouldn’t be dating right now anyway. Your future boyfriend doesn’t want to be compared to your ex or hear about all of the problems you had with them, so just don’t do it. You are there to start fresh!

 

WHO PAYS THE BILL?

Again, nobody OWES anybody anything. I have been shocked and disappointed by hearing how many women are going on dates just to get a free meal these days. Ladies, that’s horrible and guys are on to it! When the bill arrives, reach for your purse and attempt to pay. Most often, men won’t let you pay, but this shows them that you are not there just to use them.

BE APPRECIATIVE AND GRATEFUL

Your date doesn’t HAVE to pay, give you compliments, hold the door open, pull out your chair, etc. If they do these things make sure to thank them. Remember the manners your mother taught you and use them!

GOODBYE

When it comes time for your date to end, smile and thank them for their time. If you’re comfortable enough, hold their hand or give them a hug or kiss. After that, don’t play games. Don’t sit around upset that they haven’t called you. Take the initiative and reach out to them. Send a quick text later or the next day and accept their response. If a second date is meant to be, it will be. If not, don’t beat yourself up about it. Go get ready for your next date with someone else!